Something Old Something New
by HizAngel
Summary: SECOND in Chosen One Series... Angel/Cordelia


TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW"

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S) at HizAngeluv@aol.com

SPOILERS:Story picks up exactly where I left off, as in the morning after. You'll need to read the previous story to understand the storyline and understand why I had to continue it.

OTHER STORY:It's been archived at many sites. But I'll be thrilled to email it directly to you in .doc/html/.txt/or whatever format you want- one story, easy to read. Just send me a request and it is yours. 

RATING:NC-17, for all the joys of lovemaking (but not exactly smutty.)

PAIRING:Angel/Cordelia (and baby girl makes 3) 

DISCLAIMER:I don't own these characters, Joss Whedon, Mutant "grr argh" Enemy, and those other people, own them. A million thanks to them for making these characters so irresistible that people, like us, find themselves so preoccupied with WHAT IFS, that we have to express ourselves through the written word.

INSPIRATION:Thanks to everyone that shared their feelings about this storyline. It is because of you that I stay typing at 2am. Wrote this story in 16 days... it totally consumed my life... didn't eat/sleep... got sick and lost 8lbs. But I loved every minute.

FEEDBACK:Please, I shamelessly beg you........email me at HizAngeluv@aol.com or do that review thing.... keeps me inspired. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

American Writer, William Faulkner, once wrote "Between grief and nothing, I will take grief". It spoke of the most basic of all life's choices; desire to feel alive. Simple choices that every soul takes for granted; every soul but one.

Angel's simple life choices are not his to make. They have never been his to make. Existence has been on their terms. The Greater Powers make his choices; they bide his time. The consequences of their decisions about his life has always been the walls of Angel's private prison. It has always been his own hell on earth. 

Until now.

Now, Angel has more in his future than only grief and nothing. And she's currently nestled within the curve of his body as he sleeps.

Cordelia's subconscious keeps awakening her senses, reminding her of where she is and who is fitted neatly behind her. Reminding her of last night, making sure that she knows it was not a dream. Her body still looks asleep. After all, if her eyes open and she sees daylight, last night will officially be over and it's time for 'the morning after'. 

As she drifts in and out of sleep, last night's events keep replaying for her own emotional enjoyment. From the moment when Angel walked into the bathroom, it's devastatingly clear that nothing will ever be the same.

'_If you had to do it all over again?'_ her subconscious asks in order to rationalize what happened, _'would you do it differently?'_

__

'Oh, Cordelia, you're thinking too much. Go to sleep. Go to sleep,'

But inner voices seldom lay quite, especially when kept awake by the practical psyche. 

__

'Oh, I never knew it could be like that....his touch alone. How could he be that loving? I would do it all over again. Wouldn't change a thing. Not a thing.'

Sleep was now officially over; too many thoughts scattering around. Thoughts too good to forget and with a sigh brought back one moment in particular. The moment that will be forever remembered........ 

They were not to be disturbed.

Wearing only a towel, Cordelia took Angel's hand, giving him permission to lead her to the bedroom with a lot less light, a lot more shadows, and much colder without the hot steam from the shower. 

He paused by the side of the bed, not wanting to rush this night. The last thing he wanted was to force Cordelia into something she would regret. After all, friendship can be the truest form of unconditional love. Her love was already there, in that bond they shared. 

Every time she worried about his happiness, every time she'd work to make him smile, the love was there, in the open. It was for all to see and she would never hide it. Not from him, not from anyone who passed judgments on him because of who he was. Always standing up to defend his intentions. Always thinking of his feelings when no else even felt it mattered.

True friendship is priceless and seldom happens in any one's lifetime. Even those lifetimes that are centuries long. How could a soul so tortured and cursed suddenly find a such an unexpected blessing? 

Because Cordelia handed it to him without one single reservation. Without ever being asked or expected to stand by him. In this city of Angels, they stood by each other as if that was where they belonged. The misfits of Sunnydale finding solitude in the company of one another. They belonged exactly as their lives had placed them; to be the best of friends.

Angel was already completely satisfied.

Cordelia interrupted his thoughts with her hands reaching from behind. Her lips kissed across his back, leaning in, reaching to feel his chest, his stomach. With shaking hands coming to rest on his leather belt, she started to unhook it. 

He stopped and turned around with obvious hesitation.

Not allowing the questions to be asked, Cordelia pressed a finger to his lips. Seeing deep into his soul, she let her big brown eyes whisper "don't say no". 

There wasn't any words that could have been spoken at this moment. Everything Angel thought was clear in his eyes. She understood his every good intention and everything Cordelia thought rang clear in his mind. 

She understood that as well.

Kissing her softly, Cordelia's wet body trembled for every inch of her needed to touch his skin, not willing to wait longer. 

Gently he lowered her down into the softness and the protection of the blankets. Kissing her neck, her shoulders, inching away the towel, hiding what wanted to be touched. Hearing her breaths and heart pounding in her chest as his mouth opened on the rest of her body. Drawing in one breast into his mouth as his fingers found the other one to hold. Feeling her excitement grow through her body with every deep feel of his mouth, drawing her in hard.

__

'Angel' repeats louder and louder in Cordelia's mind, in perfect time with every labored breath. Touching his shoulders as they move down her stomach. Feeling his arms griping at her sides, holding firm in his touch. His kisses covered her moist stomach wanting him to slide just a little bit lower. The blood was sent racing through their veins, convincing her body that it will never be cold again. 

As Angel slowly slid her naked body along the sheets to rest near the edge of the bed, her thoughts become lost in his every touch of his tongue, keeping only one thought on the surface, _'Angel.....I've never....Angel....'_

'I've never' 

Alright, maybe two thoughts on the surface of her mind.

__

'...and his pants are still on....' 

No longer sharing the thoughts drifting over from his love, Angel is sensing nothing but her skin, her touch, her taste. Making love truly comes from the soul and never has he been so thankful that he has one, anchored for his Seer, by his Seer and for her alone. 

All that she has given him, her trust, her friendship, her remarkable compassion, is being repaid with every gentle touch. In complete control her body, Angel knows just how to bring her peak and like never before, her happiness means everything. 

Keeping her comfortable and relaxed, Angel supported her body by cradling her legs. Hands tracing along her hips. The path of his fingers brought her mouth to an open smile. A smile he doesn't see. 

Warmed from her heat, his lips found their way to their own true happiness. Hearing Cordelia moan, Angel moaned with her. Feeling her back arch as those moans deepened, becoming her only breaths, his fingers slid back along his love gently coaxing her body to feel every ounce of pleasure without any hesitation. 

From the same love they shared as when her blood fed him, urging him not to hold back his demons, to let himself go, Angel wanted Cordelia to let go. Let go for them both. 

__

'Come for me Cordelia' was the only voice that filled her thoughts. Thoughts belonging to Angel that she had never heard before. Echoing in her ears as clear as his own voice. He called to her, for her. Gently tugging away any invading notions keeping her from feeling every passion. Telling her to crave him. But she needed no evocation, the craving was there and it was unbearable. 

Relinquishing whatever control she had, Cordelia's body gave in to his desire.

Their fingers slipped together.

The growing feel of static rose from her feet, moving like a wave along her legs and exploding inside her entire body. Like power from his every touch, through her skin, through her blood, the current pulsed again and again as a cry rang through her mind and out her throat. Cordelia senses became lost in her cry, taking her away, someplace higher, only to come floating down hard. 

But Angel was waiting to catch her.

Her cries slowed as the tears filled her eyes. 

__

'What the hell was that', she thought as reality returned with a smile; knowing that she lost control of everything and not exactly knowing why. 

Angel slid into the blankets to cradled his Seer's body as her knees pulled in to feel the last pulses of the surprise gift meant only for her. Kissing her forehead, slowing her shaking breaths, it is clear it was her first orgasm. 

Waiting as her body calms, Angel's fingers lightly covered her skin sending intensified chills all the way to her toes until that beautiful smile returned and her eyes opened. 

"I truly love you" Angel whispered in Cordelia's ear, bringing forth all of the tears she struggled to hold back. Not able to keep anything locked inside anymore, Cordelia leaned into his chest and cried.

"Are you okay?"

First only nodding, she gathers the words. "I think so. I've never..... ahhh....."

"I know.....I know," smiling deeply her way and gently wiping away her tears from her cheek, "it was my pleasure".

"Doubt that....that was....amazing, Angel... it really was."

"Don't say WAS."

"Are you not done with me?"

"Only just begun"

"That can happen again?"

"Oh....", kissing her neck, pulling her in tight. "that's the idea."

Every ounce of pleasure surging through her entire being was put on hold as Angel left her side and stepped back from the bed and slowly unhooked his belt as Cordelia laid in waiting. As if a reoccurring dream becomes a reality as it actually unfolds in front of your eyes, every moment slowed as it all is recorded in memory. 

The belt fell to the floor.

__

'no wait, I wanted to do that....', she thought but her body is still finding it's way out of it's emotional freefall and it had no plans on making any sudden moves. 

But he wasn't waiting. There would be plenty of days and nights to share the responsibility of undressing each other. 

Angel removed the rest of his clothes as Cordelia watched. Every reservation she ever had about the body on this vampire, suddenly disappeared. Never could she find a more perfect man. If any physical body should live forever, it must be this one. Even from the very dim light, Cordelia knew no other man could ever be his replacement.........

__

'very dim light.....why didn't Dennis light another candle..... or four?' Cordelia's eyes still remained closed but her body was now wide awake especially after replaying the initial bed moment in her mind. _'At least with more candles I could have really seen him naked.'_

With that very thought announcing itself as a wakeup call, her eyes sprung open to face the dreaded morning light. After all, this was worth waking up for, the realization that Angel was indeed still naked. He was naked, naked, naked. In her bed, behind her body, naked, naked, naked. 

Confronting the first morning light never felt so exciting.

Carefully, she rolled over to face him, simulating a comfortable yet restless sleep, just in case he was actually awake and being very quite. But Angel didn't notice, he was sound asleep only inches from her body. Like dozens of times before, she was struck by how he looked like a little boy with no cares or worries just peacefully asleep. Clearly, his soul was intact; nothing evil could ever look so adorable.

Inching the comforter up and back, gently as to not wake him, Cordelia encouraged the light to enter their bed and show off his body. All of it. She would get a flashlight out, if readily available, as long as he stays asleep. 

After everything he got to see last night, it would only be fair.

Despite her efforts, the way he was laying concealed mostly everything vital, but just the outline of his beautiful body made her ache for his touch all over again. If she could get him to roll away, roll over, something. But curiosity killed the cat.

"What are you doing?"

Startled, she dropped the blankets and covered her mouth to hide the laughter.

"huh, what are you doing?" he matched her smile and removed the hands from her mouth to see it clearer.

Embarrassed by her actions she turned to only face the pillow, "I was....I was...... checking you out."

"You were checking me out, were you."

"Yes," turning back to enter her defense. "Well it's only fair, isn't it. Last night you could get your PhD after my physical exam. I'd even go so far as to say you can probably tell me how many freckles I have and where."

"Hmm...probably." Kissing her forehead, settling these new inhibitions that he never knew existed in Cordelia Chase, he uttered a welcomed "Good morning". His arms reached to pull her closer as his hands touched her silk negligee. "Cordelia, you put clothes on? Why did you put clothes?" 

"Good morning." she replied "and, yes, I put something on, in the middle of the night, it was near the bed and convenient. I just thought that maybe I should with the day and all." 

"Cordelia, how could you possibly be embarrassed by your body. Have you looked in the mirror. Do you know what you look like?"

Embarrassed with the question, she turned to face the pillow again.

"I do. You're as close to perfect that I have ever seen and I have seen beautiful women." 

"Yes I know, you've been around, no need to be reminiscent of all your past sexual encounters. After two and a half centuries, and looking like you do, you're bound to have experience and it shows. You know what you're doing and I don't. That's okay. it's just, Angel, I was, maybe a little...... nervous about the morning... after last night."

"Nervous?"

"So much, I hardly slept."

"You're nervous... nervous now...with me....why?" 

"Well maybe not nervous, just..... apprehensive."

Angel sat up and pulled her body along with his making certain that she hears his every word. "Look at me Cor. Did you honestly think I was going to change on you as if last night hadn't meant anything to me? Do you think that? Please don't think that I'd change. I didn't. I haven't. I won't change."

"No, Angel, I didn't mean you losing your soul. I wasn't talking about that. Not that."

"Well that's not what I meant either. You and me, that part changing. Last night, meant more to me than you know, believe me. A lot more."

Angel's fingers slid along the thin shoulder straps of the negligee, resenting their presence covering her body.

"I couldn't wait to wake up to you this morning." He leaned in and gently kissed her lips. "Of course I wasn't prepared for you acting as Private Investigator and all...." again kissing her as she smiled with embarrassment, "but I love you still....and nothing has changed."

She nodded in relief. 

"So....can I take this off of you now? Please Cor, no clothes, not yet." With her arms held away signifying permission, Angel slipped the silky red negligee up along her body and tossed it far across the room where it belonged.

"You know, I only wanted to take a hot bath, but I feel like I've been naked for days. You've seen so much of me....it's not fair. I've hardly seen you." 

Returning the kisses back to his mouth, she slowly lifted up and moved her body to touch his. Settling down on his lap, feeling him press against her center, gently rocking to wake the rest of his body, 

"but I've felt you." ..kiss... her body pressing down

"I have certainly felt you." ..kiss... re-adjusting and pressing down harder 

"and I can still feel you" ..kiss... _oh.. he's awake_

"you had your way with me" ..kiss... _he's very awake_

"and it's still not fair." 

"Hmm.... not fair, huh?" He pushed away from her body and fell back to the cushion of the mattress, leaving the blankets carelessly back by where Cordelia straddled him. Angel was giving her the open invitation to play. He would deny her nothing she ever wanted. 

"well then," settling into the bed, "I..... am.... all.... yours....."

Vampires are never shy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 2/11

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

HINT:It's time to get dressed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At some point, they both knew their functional day would have to start. Cordelia's stomach was way ahead of them. The growls were loud enough to wake Dennis. In addition, it was also only a matter of time before Wesley made an appearance. Which posed another problem.

"What are we going to tell Wesley?"

Angel was still laying on his back with a pillow covering his face, trying to keep out as much light as possible. Cordelia was fitted nicely between his legs with her head resting on his stomach.

"Angel..... What are we going to tell Wesley?"

"Nothing," he muttered.

"He's going to figure it out, especially if we don't get some clothes on soon. I think it's after lunch already, or so says my stomach."

"This is between you and me, Cordelia. Wesley doesn't need to know."

"But we shouldn't keep secrets from each other."

"Well he'll find out when we want him to know. Let's just keep this between us for now."

"Why?", pulling the pillow from his face. "I want someone to know."

Pulling back his pillow, "Dennis knows."

"Oh right. Dennis knows." Cordelia moved away from his body and sat up with the blankets wrapped around her leaving him completely exposed. "All right, I'm leaving you. I have to find something to eat. I'm so hungry I could eat my pillow. Guess you're not getting up to cook or anything, huh?"

He lifted the pillow only for a moment but long enough to show that he is smiling, which, in this case, meant a definite NO.

"Fine. Go back to sleep. Overdue that nocturnal thing while you're at it. Do you want a blanket back?"

"Yes." He rolled over and readjusted the pillow. "Blanket..... Please."

"Here..... cover up that white butt of yours.... it's blinding.... I'm going to go and take a shower.... I smell like an Angel." leaving the bedroom she poignantly added, "Not that I mind...."

Angel laughed into the mattress.

Adjusting the comforter draped around her body, Cordelia walked into the living room, kissed her fingertips and rested them on Dennis' wall. "Thank you Dennis. You can come out of the wall now. Not like you're banished to it."

Checking to be certain Angel stayed in the room, she leaned in and softly whispered, "and about what Angel said, about my body, being off limit's and all, well it can be our little secret....if you still want...I mean."

The loud knock on the door made her lose the hold on the blanket. 

It was Wesley. Wesley was here and she was still naked. 

Naked since last time Wesley was over.

Frantically darting back to the bedroom, she pulled on a spandex exercise set since it was the easiest thing to wear. Angel turned and watched with great amusement, surprised to see just how panicked she was over Wesley.

"Angel. Don't just lie there! Go back to sleep, already. I can handle this. it's only Wesley!" 

Oh this was going to be fun.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey Wes... what's up?"

Wesley adjusted his glasses as he wondered why Cordelia seemed so out of breath. "Hello Cordelia, good morning. Or should I say afternoon. Is your phone broken?"

"What? Huh?.... Nah ah. Ah, no the phone is fine." She pressed her lips together realizing just how stupid she sounded.

"Well, I thought perhaps you'd call. So I waited.... and waited. Until I came to realize that you didn't care and you would not be calling anytime soon. Cordelia, could I possibly come in or did you want me to stand out here all day?"

Pulling the door opened, she gestured that IN was a given and that it was his fault he was still standing outside.

If Dennis had emerged from the wall, it wasn't for long. After last evening, he was surely to be on Wesley's exorcist list. Wesley had that strong hesitant look about reentering the phantoms domain. Which made Cordelia wonder, what did Dennis do to him?

Unloading the scroll and the two accompanying books into the kitchen, Wesley first inspected Dennis' wall.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm looking for an apparition's residue. You know, after last evening's events I thought certainly you'd be concerned."

"After _which _events last night?" 

"Your poltergeist's actions, the one you so affectionately refer to as Dennis, threatened my life! Would have killed me, I'm sure, had I not left."

"Oh he did not Wesley, you're exaggerating. And keep your voice down! Dennis will hear you and you'll wake up Angel. In the room. Angel's been asleep in there since I got up. This morning. Early. I was up pretty early. And he was out all night. Angel."

Fortunately, Wesley was too preoccupied with the doubt about Dennis, to notice just how strange Cordelia was acting.

"Well he most certainly did threaten by life. You were not witness. Neither one of you were present. But mind this when I say that your Dennis is as evil a haunting as I have beheld. Dennis must be purged from this dwelling. And before I forget..... this note was taped to your door."

Cordelia snatched the note from his hand, "Nothing is getting PURGED in this house, Wes, without my permission! You just got the wrong impression. Dennis is sweet and wonderful and if anything, he just doesn't like you."

"Well that is more or less accurate. He certainly let me know that I was no longer welcome."

She unfolded the note and read the scribbles. "So what did Dennis do to you or don't I want to know?"

"First I felt a blast of cold air and a truly foul odor."

"Okay, the air conditioning was breezy and you forgot you ate Mexican."

Not appreciating her humor, Wesley continued. "Then, so very deliberately, he manipulated the M&Ms from the candy jar and spelled GET OUT right on the scroll."

Cordelia burst with laughter, imagining Wesley's terrified exit based entirely on some wayward M&Ms. After the sound of the slamming door, she truly expected some flying weapons had to have been involved. 

"Oh, that's too funny. See how Dennis has a sense of humor? M&Ms..... really Wesley, don't be such a drama queen."

"Not the method Cordelia.....the message. Always remember that. So what does that note say?"

"Oh, it's just a reminder from someone. A favor I agreed to do for them. I was hoping to forget, or should I say that she would forget. But I as I can see. ... no such luck. Don't give me that look Wes, it's just that Sue, in the next apartment over, is turning 30 tomorrow. Her sister is throwing her a surprise party and they want to have it here. She'll never suspect a thing. The ONLY reason I agreed is that it will be catered and I'm hoping for awesome leftovers."

She tossed the note on the countertop and walked over to the scroll and the text books.

"I didn't get the chance to talk to you about Sunnydale and the scroll stuff. How did it go? Find anything interesting?"

Wesley was eager to share his big news about Angel's future and elaborate on the Shanshu prophecy. It was that eagerness that caused Angel to get up and get dressed.

"Well actually, we ...."

"Good morning, Wesley"

"Oh, hello Angel. Sorry to have awoken you so early, being early afternoon and all. I was just telling Cordelia..."

"Yes Angel, I thought you were sleeping?"

Angel past by the fierce glare shooting from her eyes to simply answer, "woke up. Thought I'd take a shower then make you lunch for when you got back."

"Cordelia, where are you going dressed like....."

"Go where? Where did I say I was going?"

"Jogging. You say you were going jogging. Remember."

"Oh right..... yep. Jogging. Before it gets too hot. Thanks for reminding me. Got to go and work up that appetite. Not that I haven't DONE THAT ALREADY."

Angel tried desperately to hide his smile as he leaned against the kitchen sink. It was killing her to be so amicable when it was clear, he was trying to get rid of her. At least with her out of the house, he could discuss the matter of secrecy with Wesley. It would also, give him enough time to think of an excuse to tell Cordelia....after the jog.

Wesley was surprised to see Cordelia so carelessly dressed. "I must say, Cordelia, don't you think you should possibly change; put something else on. Something that won't attract so much attention and cause an auto accident in the interim. Maybe, brush your hair while your at it."

Angel smirked even more at the polite insults thrown Cordelia's way, "Wesley is right, Cor. You should definitely change."

"No Angel. I'm wearing this.... this.... perfectly suitable....", now realizing what she was actually wearing.... "hot pink gym equivalent to bra and underwear." 

Giving in to the boys now, after the hair insult, would be too much of a defeat.

"So, please, come jog beside me Angel. You can protect me......... with your huge ball of flame!"

Grabbing her tennis shoes, Cordelia stormed out of the house, leaving behind the additional comments that were certainly forming on the men's tongues. In addition, she also left behind the discussion of the scroll's prophecies.

"Is she mad at you for something?"

"No. She's not mad. Wesley, do me a favor....... do not talk to Cordelia about what you learned from the scroll. Tell her nothing."

"But Angel, it was the first thing out of her mouth. She wants to know and when she get something in that head..."

"Don't have to tell me that. I know."

"After all, she was the one that urged me to go to Sunnydale, consult Rupert's help. What if she asks me again, which she definitely will, the very moment she returns."

"I will be the only person who is going to tell her, Wesley. And another thing, I don't want anyone else knowing. Who all in Sunnydale knows?"

"Giles and Willow"

"Willow. Do you think she will tell anyone?"

"If you mean anyone, being Buffy, there is always that chance. This is a big revelation, Angel. Buffy has the right to know. Then again, something this big, should come from you. You should go to Buffy."

"it's a mistake, Wesley. What makes any of you think that it has to be Buffy? Why would either of them tell her if no one is sure."

"Are you actually saying, that despite what the scroll spells out in perfect detail, and despite everything you've shared with Buffy, that your futures aren't meant to end together?"

"Please..... I can't talk about this..... not now. We have to buy a little time here; try and find everything we can. Because, what if we're wrong?"

"We're not wrong."

"Promise me Wesley, when Cordelia asks you again, you'll make something harmless up. Demon uprising or something."

"Lie to her?"

"Not lying. No one can know until we are completely certain. Promise me."

"Alright Angel. I promise."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 3/11

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel's shower was interrupted by the telephone. Cordelia had literally run off nearly an hour ago and he was starting to worry. So, with only a towel, he rushed to the phone.

"Hello"

At first, there was just silence, until an all too familiar voice spoke.

"Angel?"

Now it was time for him to lose his towel. It was the last sound he had expected to hear after the night he spent in Cordelia's bed.

"Buffy?"

"Angel...... what are you doing at Cordelia's?"

"Ahh well..... actually Buffy, I've been staying here since the explosion. You know, the fire. You do know about the fire, don't you?"

"Well Giles did mention it. I thought you would stay with Wesley. Why on earth would you be staying at Cordelia's."

Angel was busy panicking for the right words to come, all the while trying to reattach his wet towel. This was obviously not going to be a one minute conversation. If only he had left the machine get it.....

"Ahh well.... for a couple reasons. Why were you calling Cordelia anyway?"

"Is she there?"

"No. She's not here. She was earlier. But she's not now. She's jogging."

"Angel, what's wrong with you? You sound strange."

"Sorry. I was in the shower. Should get dressed before she walks in. You know."

"Angel......we need to talk."

His eyes closed at that dreaded old line. One of them must have told her about The Chosen One. Unbelievable. Why else would she be calling just the day after Wesley's return?

"But I see that now is a bad time. I still need to talk to Cordelia, I have some questions for her, and now, I have a few more questions. Please tell her to call me tonight. I'm not patrolling, so I'll be here."

Angel just stayed silent, something Buffy was used to, especially on the phone.

"And I'll talk to you later. Bye Angel."

After their goodbye's, Angel leaned back against the doorway to the bathroom. Everything regarding his secret just suddenly became incredibly difficult. He should tell Cordelia, before anything else gets out of hand. Tell her now. How could he tell her?

Deep emotional conversations were not his specialty. Even though he tried to imagine her reactions to the news, nothing was going to prepare him for the talk. 

How would he even start to tell her about his future and her future. Their future. Together. 

"Was that Cordelia?" Wesley yelled from the dining room table.

"No. Just.......a friend of hers."

Angel retreated back to the shower, wishing he could stay there for eternity or at least the rest of the day. He had been so preoccupied with Cordelia's position in the prophecy, he had forgotten to think how hard this was going to be on Buffy.

No matter what paths her life would take, Buffy always knew that Angel would be forever in love with her.

It was something that Buffy counted on. It was the one stable thing that Angel could give her. She had been his entire existence. There were parts of her that still stayed within him. No amount of years would take that away. Not even the years he will spend with Cordelia, alive and raising their daughter. 

Buffy had given him a reason to go on with his endless life. She reassured him that his life was worth saving. That he actually mattered in the giant scheme of things. It was the first time, in forever, that his soul felt loved. 

But Cordelia was giving him the reason and the ability to live, really truly live. Somehow, she also managed to find a new way to give him love. Pure, unconditional love.

That too was a first.

Angel would make Buffy understand. Somehow, he would.

For now, the two women in his life, should undeniably not speak to each other. Buffy's message was going to be forgotten. He had no other choice.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In was late afternoon and after her combination of no sleep, a long jog in the California sunshine, breakfast and lunch together, Cordelia found the cushions on the sofa irresistibly inviting. 

With the men still buried in moldy old transcriptions, she stretched out in the living room and allowed her consciousness to wonder.

And where was it wondering?

Where she had left off the last time her consciousness was drifting into new territory. 

Warm and fuzzy territory.

Last night still seemed so close at hand, and the without any imagination, her body rekindled those last waves of it's pleasure. So where was she in the scheme of the night. Oh yea, now she remembered.......

His belt fell to the floor. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 4/11

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

NOTE:Okay, I know I first mentioned -no smut-. but.....I may have strayed just a little bit......... 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel knew exactly what he was doing, unlike her obvious lack of experience. 

She didn't need experience. There was no feeling of inadequacy raging through her thoughts. She simply was willing to let him be in control. 

And she was more than willing to watch her number one sexual fantasy, become reality in front of her very eyes.

Never ending his contact with her eyes, Angel unhooked the button on his jeans and slid the zipper slowly down. 

Her stare didn't fluctuate. Good sign that she wasn't changing her mind. Although he prepared himself for the possibility, after all, this night may have already been too overwhelming. 

The jeans came all the way down. He stepped out of them, leaving them forsaken on the carpet. 

Her look was changing, but it was anticipation that was showing in her eyes, not hesitation. She was smiling, too, and he noticed. He also returned the smile.

Waiting. 

Impatiently, waiting. 

Clenching her toes, waiting.

The tight black boxers were inched over his hips and then allowed to find their new resting place, accompanying the jeans.

After one exaggerated exhale, Cordelia stopped breathing. 

This was better than any dream she could have premeditated.

Angel moved towards her body, leaned onto the bed, and buried himself into the softness of the blankets. He kissed her lips, inching them open, helping her breath.

"Dehlia...are you sure?"

With the softest touch she could manage, Cordelia slid her hand to his hip and her other to his face. With the very touch of his love, his body quivered, revving his enjoyment of her mouth. As her heart pounded, she explored the softness of his skin. 

Not nearly as cold as she thought a vampire would feel. Reassuring her fingertips, she hunted for warmth. Only to find it buried down in the blankets.

Angel's head leaned down onto hers. He was loving the attention. Loving her roaming hand exploring. That attention answered his question. 

Yes, she wanted him.

Angel was ready. Unmistakably yearning to be buried deep inside her body; exploring the heat being generated by that racing blood in her veins. The blood he could still taste on the back of his tongue.

Moving back to sit upright on the bed, Angel pulled her body with his. Her lips slid from his mouth and inched along his face found their way to his ear. With heavily labored breaths, "I need you in me......now Angel."

What Cordelia wants, Cordelia gets.

Taking hold of her ass, sliding on the sheets, he moved her naked body to face his. Leaning in, he pulled her closer never letting go of her eyesight. 

His chest brushed against her breasts, again and again, starting their rhythm. 

Upright, in all her glory, Cordelia inched down to touch him lightly. Slowly again, feeling his wetness mix with her own, she inched down further, retreating to only catch her breath.

He leaned into her body again, helping her thighs move around his, feeling her opening for him. Angel kept control of her mouth and shared her warm breaths as he guided her body completely down onto his. 

A muffled cry filled her throat, closing her eyes, clenching her lip.

Directing her rhythm, Angel was repeatedly consumed by her body. Her muscles squeezed him in perfect time. With the help of his embrace, she rocked herself again and again, allowing her body to adjust to his. 

Her fingertips clenched at his shoulders, supporting the thrusts. Only falling still when she nearly collapsed from own weakness.

With their bodies now dampened with sweat, he stayed buried in her warmth as he lowered her back down onto the mattress and slowly continued sliding back into her, deeper and harder.

With every perfect stroke, Cordelia's eyes closed and reopened. Reaffirming that this was not a dream. Angel was on top of her, inside of her, stretching her, filling her so completely. 

Nothing in life could ever feel so wonderful. The love in his eyes was undeniable. 

He was the love of her life. 

And this was the time of her life.

Supporting her lower back with his arm, Angel buried deeper, but still careful not to hurt this body he so utterly adored. 

Their shared wetness and Cordelia's uncontrollable groans were the only sounds heard. He loved that she moved with him, matching his efforts perfectly. Bending her legs to feel his body moving. Arching to pull him deeper. Clenching him as he retreated. 

Her building orgasm was as close to torture as she could stand. Her impatient cries were flooding with emotions telling him how close she truly was to exploding. 

It was everything he wanted to give her, again. 

Cordelia's physical needs came first. So, his waiting orgasm was going to have to wait.

He slowed down to a stop, leaning down to kiss her opened mouth. When he pulled out of her body, the overwhelming feeling of emptiness consumed her and her eyes opened with surprise sadness.

"Shhhh. It's okay." He whispered on her lips as a single tear ran across her face. 

Taking one of the pillows, he laid it beside her body. Encouraging her body to roll and lean into it's softness. She abided his wishes. 

Angel pressed his body to hers, kissing the back of her neck, inching down her spine. His hands curved around her body and into the pillow. Finding their place squeezing the fullness of her breasts in the same rhythm as their lovemaking all the while pressing himself against her. She arched to meet his every touch.

His fingers traveled down her stomach. Feeling her center, tracing the muscles where he had just been, Angel knew just how to touch provoke her rising pleasure. Her wetness covered his fingertips calling out for deeper penetration. A deeper satisfaction.

Her body was aching for it's release.

Cordelia didn't need further direction. She knew where she wanted him.

Moving her knee to be nearer the pillow, he eagerly regained his place in her body. With a rising pace from the caresses of his fingertips, his body matched the movements. Every stroke ended by being immersed to her very core. 

This time, Angel didn't need to ask her. She openly delivered. 

The pounding waves came to her stronger than before. Not just starting at her feet, but traveling from every part of her body and soul. Colliding together where Angel was buried, sucking out the closest thing to life he had to give. 

The pillow engulfed her cries of pleasure and Angel fell into her body, forcing her pulses to grow stronger and harder, and now allowed his body to feel the same ecstasy.

Angel's perfect happiness overtook his strength. Content simply with the embrace of their still shaking bodies; he folded with her until she let him go. 

They calmed together........

"Ah-hum.....Cordelia .......... and what are you thinking about?"

Nearly falling off the sofa from fright, she pulled herself together. "Will you stop honing in on my what my brain is doing! Nothing is left a mystery with you around."

"Well, your brain isn't what I was honing in on. Didn't have to." He lowered his tone while making his point. 

"Cordelia, you're laying on the couch, eyes shut, mouth open, and your legs are rubbing together. Little too obvious especially with Wesley in the kitchen."

"I was trying to be back in the moment."

"Not that I'm not flattered, I am. Just be a little more careful when he's around. Put the stereo headphones on if you're going to be...... back in the moment again." 

Looking behind him, checking to see if they were alone, "how about waiting till he's gone then we can both get back in the moment."

Her fingers covered her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. She didn't like keeping secrets from Wesley, but being a little sneaky was producing it's own source of excitement, not that she really needed another source.

"Well, I get the feeling he's never going to leave. You know how he is when he get a bug up his ...... Oh quiet, here he comes."

"All right you two, I'm leaving."

"WHAT?", they both said in unison.

"So, do you two want to come?"

"Ah. Come?" Angel and Cordelia looked at each other, speechless. 

Wesley, when obsessed with a project, would normally stay up with the text books until the early morning hours and now suddenly he's leaving and the sun is still up. 

Was this something Dennis had done?

"Remember, I have that appointment with David Nabbitt, the billionaire geek. He's showing me the one office building that he had restored. They are almost completed with it and he said we can have our choice of unit's. We already know where Angel's apartment will be, sewer handy and all. I'm sure he wouldn't mind if we all go."

Cordelia's happiness glow faded to dim in an instant. It was clear in her face. The fact that Angel would eventually move into his own place. Leaving her alone, again. With Dennis, but still alone. She may still be working by his side everyday, but it would not be the same. Angel had been alone far too long and Cordelia hated the idea of being separated, especially now. 

Angel should be in her bed. 

"No Wesley, you go ahead. I'll get back to the ...." looking down at Cordelia's saddened face knowing the 'moving out conversation' was about to start, "books. Get back to the books."

"Well then Cordelia, can you get ready to go? I think he may even spring for supper."

"No Wesley. I'm not feeling very good. You go. But it's your first date, so remember, don't sleep with him or he'll think you're easy."

Wesley turned and walked out of the apartment virtually unnoticed. Angel was staring at Cordelia and she was staring at her feet. They both knew the living arrangement was only temporary. After all, the apartment was not suitable as an office and the plants were starting to die without any sunlight.

Everything Angel thought about saying was certainly going to come out wrong. Instead he took her lead and remained momentarily silent, kneeling back down to get comfortable on the floor by the sofa.

"Are you really not feeling good?"

"I just said that."

"Well. How do you feel?"

Cordelia's faced brightened again from the touch of his hand feeling across her waist. 

"What are we going to play doctor again. I didn't make an appointment. Is the doctor ready to see me again." 

The mischievous grin returned to her face and Angel couldn't have been more relieved.

Pulling his shirt in to bring his lips closer, Angel was happy to oblige. He kissed her deeply, touching his tongue to hers. Only pausing to clarify something.

"So you don't want to talk about, you know, what Wesley talked about?"

"Angel, where do you live right now?"

He kissed her again, liking the way her mind was working. "With you."

"So, you live with me?"

"I live with you."

"With me?"

"With you"

"And are we alone?"

"We are. Phantom excluded."

"Then what did you want to talk about?"

Moving to lean over her, talking her arms and directing them to fold around his body, he kissed her neck as she arched backwards into the cushions. Taking the initiative this time, she slipped off her tank top and quickly removed his as well. 

Touching skin on skin was the affection she was so urgently craving all afternoon.

His lips found their place crawling down Cordelia's chest and along the edge of her bra. With a fingertip, he traced just underneath the lace edge, teasing her, feeling the stimulation of her breasts. She heaved into his touch, trying to get closer. 

Like only moments before, her legs started to writhe, pulling her knees to be wrapped around him. Everything wanted to be touched by his skin.

The fingertip moved aside and was replaced by his tongue. Slowly moving up under the edge of the lace on her bra. Making her breast cold and wet and her nipples very alert. He too was finding himself incredibly alert. Just feeling her skin next to his body was unbearable. 

Angel wanted her to be naked. Underneath him. In front of him. On top of him. With her long dark hair falling on his chest then tossed back to stretch down her back. He wanted her to cry out again for him. He wouldn't mind a scream either. A good little scream. 

But he couldn't push too much. She's so young and so very impressionable. He had to be careful not to hurt her, in anyway, physically, emotionally. Someone had to have the responsibility and he had lifetimes of experience. 

As long as she was happy; that's all that really mattered. Whatever Cordelia wanted, she could have.

Cordelia knew what she wanted. She made it perfectly clear.

Pushing him down along side the couch, she nestled down on his lap, feeling him underneath her, straining. Feeling the sexual rhythm beating in her head, she worked it out on him. Fitting against him, her muscles clenched around him, rubbing down into his body, right through his jeans. 

Angel lifted her hands from his chest and pulled her in, feeling her breasts rubbing his chest. With kisses that stole her every breath, he slipped the bra straps down her shoulders and effortlessly unsnapped the front hook, releasing her body for his hands to touch.

Glancing over at Dennis' wall he reminded her that they are probably being watched. 

Cordelia smiled. "And?"

Angel smiled back. "Cordelia Chase. Where's that shyness gone?"

"Gone with Wesley. To your new apartment."

He stopped her kisses. "Wait Wait" Angel paused her body from grinding on his lap and then held everything still. "Well maybe we should talk about this new apartment thing."

In immediate frustration, she collapsed down on his chest. "No I don't want to talk about it. I know. Angel. You're going to leave me and it won't ever be like this again."

Angel moved her away onto the carpet and adjusted himself in order to sit up.

"Sorry, did I hurt you?"

"No, you didn't hurt me. Cordelia, nothing is going to change. At least, not that much. We'll be living apart but that could be a good thing, too. You need your space; we both need our own space. It's the right thing to do."

"But you won't watch me sleep anymore."

"Says who?"

"Will you?"

"Nocturnal. Remember."

A smile returned to her face. "Will I.... occasionally find you in my bed?"

"Will I occasionally find you in mine?"

The smile on her face got bigger. Angel pushed the hair from her eyes and rubbed her cheek curved up from her smile. "This thing we have, it isn't temporary for us. Trust me. I know."

Cordelia turned to face her body into the couch and leaned against his shoulder, clinging to whatever ever skin of his she could find. 

"Ah, there's my shy girl again." He pulled her in and kissed her forehead. 

Folding up against his lap, she felt a nice kind of contentment. Then remembering that, thanks to her actions, he was probably not feeling at all content. At least not in a physical sense. 

"Umm, so where were we?"

"Oh yea......you were getting nasty on my lap. Not that I minded. But, maybe, we could save that for later. I don't want that kind of attention if you're doing it for the wrong reasons."

"But I want to give you that kind of attention. I want to make you happy. Like you made me, quite a few times, till my lips were numb kind of happy."

Angel pulled her around to rest on his lap. Moving her hair to fall on the carpet, he is satisfied to just look at her face.

__

'She has the most incredible eyes', thinking to himself. He fingered down the full front of her body. Relaxing her eyelids to fall closed as she took in all of the adoration. 

With her body at ease, she groaned, "You really are Mr.-Breast-Exam Man aren't you.......Angel, I had no idea how into breasts you were." 

While laughing to herself a song filled her thoughts...... _'mine are bigger than Buffy's ........mine are bigger than Buffy's..........oh shit what if he heard that!'._

He did.

"Hey!", as she reacted to the pinch.

"Don't HEY me!"

"What?"

"Don't WHAT me either. You know what!" 

"Well I need something to help me feel a little superior, don't I?"

"No. Nothing. Not even these. As beautiful as they are. Doesn't matter."

With a deep breath of satisfaction and desire to have the last word with an unexpected, "Mine are bigger", Cordelia's head turned into his stomach and her smile drifted away.

"You look tired. No need to wonder why.... "

"I am a little tired."

"You need your sleep, especially if you're going to keep feeding me. You can't get sick because of me."

Cordelia's eyes opened again, "Which.......... reminds me of the technical question, how often do I have to 'feed' you?"

"Any time you want it, baby"

"Angel, I'm serious. How often?"

"Just close your eyes. I'll let you know when. You might even be able to tell when I need it... blood, your blood that is."

"Sooner or later, you're gonna have to bite me."

"Later........ now close your eyes."

"Do I make you happy, Angel?"

"Shhh. Yes. You don't know just how happy you make me, Cor, but you will. Now ... close these eyes."

But Angel was thinking something else. He was thinking about what he really wanted to say out loud. That time would be coming soon. Soon he'll be certain about their future, and only then will he make it all clear.

Then Cordelia will know just how happy Angel will be to be human. Experience everything that real life has to offer. 

And just how happy he will be with two women in his life with eyes that beautiful. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 5/11

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

HINT:When you least expect to see someone, that's usually when you do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Why was she doing this again? Okay, it doesn't hurt to make new acquaintances, especially those living in your apartment complex. You never know when you could meet a person who could know someone that used to be married to somebody famous. It is Los Angeles and anything is possible.

The acting career had most likely been forsaken. Not that she spoke of it much, but after the stay in the hospital with all the horrible visions of the helpless in need, some things in life seemed more important. 

Since that time, she had stopped the obvious attempts to make the big contacts, do the networking. Meet influential people. Lately, it didn't seem so important.

Giving her best attempt to combat her own lack of efforts, Cordelia agreed to offer her apartment as party central. Socializing is a skill; this would merely be a refresher course. 

What's one party? After all, how long could they stay and would all this food really be eaten?

She had spent nearly all day cleaning and running back to the store for silly items to make the place seem a little less, well.... inhabited by a vampire. Not willing to throw any of her dying plants in the trash, she moved them to the kitchen so no one would rush their inevitable death. At least the cactus Angel gave her was still hanging on. But then again, what does a cactus look like when it's dead?

The highly anticipated 'Surprise!' was set to happen at 7:30. All the guests were urged to be ready and in position by 7:15. Wesley and Angel were quick to claim a corner of the dining room table as soon as the caterer and the first guest arrived.

At least with part of the dining room, they could still be considered social, a private clique perhaps, but still somewhat social.

Wesley was actually eager for the party and the music to begin. He had already introduced himself to the caters and offered assistance with setting up the food. Angel, on the other hand, stayed for one reason and one reason only. Cordelia. She gave him an intense guilt trip. 

Given the choice of his instincts, he would rather be off hunting demons in the sewers than making small talk with some of these West Coast women hunting for eligible rich bachelors. Which could describe the majority of the females who kept parading through the front door and were eager to make eye contact. 

They were also eager to ask Cordelia, 'who is that?' which kept getting the same response from her mouth: TAKEN.

"Will you two get this scroll out of here! Please. It's gross and it smells like grandpa breath."

"Cordelia, have a little respect. This is a priceless artifact. Can never be replaced."

"Well it stinks Wesley! I've been wondering what that smell is lately and it is definitely that ugly moldy thing. And get these books out of here! They're going to freak people out if they see them. I have enough on my mind with Dennis and Angel lurking around."

"Hey!... I'm not lurking. I'm sitting here. No plans on lurking or skulking coming from over here."

"Well glad to hear it. Don't just drink any...." 

A sudden intense fear overcame her but was quickly hushed by Angel's reassuring, "I hid the blood in the vegetable drawer. Weapons are also hidden. Stop worrying so much."

"Oh.....what about Wesley's fighting axe on the mantel?"

"Hidden on the inside of the fireplace."

"How about those drawings........ you know..... THOSE drawings."

"Also hidden away. Stop the worrying! Not as if you know these people. Soooo..... when is this party going to be over?...hmmm?..."

With Wesley engrossed in the newest addition of cookie trays, Cordelia relayed her best 'you are SO getting laid tonight' look she could manage. 

It was undoubtedly well received. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The people came. Surprise was yelled. More people came.

And more people came.

And the evening was just starting to get interesting.

Cordelia pushed her way through the maze of bodies occupying her living room. The knocking on the door was becoming fierce. The last thing she needed was a another visit by the LAPD. 

Taking a deep breath to calm her nerves, she pulled open the door.

"Hello Deary"

Cordelia's mouth fell open and a gasp of terror came rushing in.

"Are you having a party, my dear? Without inviting me?"

"Angel!", she yelled in the direction of the living room. "Angel!!! quickly! think it's for you."

The music, since the first visit by the police, was lowered, but it was still extremely loud. Angel couldn't hear much over all of the noise. He didn't have to, he immediately felt her fear and rushed past the guests and pulled Cordelia from the opened doorway. 

Cordelia had every reason to be terrified.

"Hello Daddy. Did you miss your kitten? You never call."

"Drusilla."

"Invite me in Angel, my love."

"Not a chance Dru, what are you doing here?"

"Invite me in for the party." With a wicked grin, she hissed, "I'll behave. You know how I love parties. And lovely party favors. Anyone here you don't like? I'll take them off your hands."

Cordelia moved Angel's arm aside, "It's not our party but you can't come in. You're not invited. Is she Angel?"

"No, she's not. Why are you here?"

Drusilla giggled. 

"Dru......Is Spike with you?"

"Eww Spike, bloody hell no! Spike is back in Sunnydale making nice nice with the Slayer's little kiddy friends. Becoming rather chummy from what I hear... and speaking of kiddy friends..." Dru glares at Cordelia and moves to get as close as possible. Cordelia countermoves. ".... Angel, darling... you've kept one for yourself... little Miss Cheerleader.... tasty choice."

Angel filled with impatience got firm with his childe, "Dru.... why are you here? If you don't know, will you please just leave."

Cordelia agreed and confidently added, "Yea, Leave!"

"Watch your manners, Deary. I could kill you where you stand."

Angel moved Cordelia behind his body, keeping her in place. "No one is killing anyone Dru, will you please just leave!"

Instead she walked along the doorway entrance, looking deviously amused. 

"The birds always sing songs about you, Love. They fill my head with thoughts of my Angel. Sometimes..........you're all I can think about." She reaches to touch his face, but he moves further back from her reach.

"Then there was the Moon. Came and whispered a secret to me. Secrets secrets Angel. Want to know what it was?" Her glare switched from Angel over to Cordelia.

"Do you want to know a secret, little girl."

Angel froze. Drusilla knew something of the prophecy and this was not the time for it to be revealed.

"Cordelia, go back to your guests, I can handle her."

"Oh yes, he can handle me. Nothing like being handled by my Angel. Isn't that right, little missy.

"What did you say?" Cordelia interjected as Angel tried to move her away from the door.

Drusilla fingered her way down her own neck, lusting over her own memories of Angelus. "Oh Deary. You haven't lived until you've been necked by my Angel. Makes you his little concubine, he does. Angel makes you crave it."

"Please, spare me the details, Drusilla!"

"Oh but darling girl, Angel's details are the best part." 

This was not happening. A visit from Drusilla was the last thing Angel needed. Dru was too connected with his own thoughts which could prove disastrous in the presence of Cordelia. If Drusilla had insight, he would have to become educated in that knowledge elsewhere.

"Cordelia, please. I'll take her for a ride, away from here."

"What? Are you crazy Angel? She could hurt you!"

Drusilla giggled at the very thought. "He likes it when you hurt him a little, don't you Angel? Likes you to use your teeth a bit."

Ignoring the sexual remarks hoping that Cordelia does the same, "She's not going to hurt me. Are you Dru?"

"Will you bring me something to eat? One of those morsels dancing about?"

"If you are hungry, I have blood in the refrigerator."

Drusilla pulled back and touched her tongue with a obvious look of disgust, "Eww, no Angel, I don't think I'd like that. Is it still in a body?"

"No bodies, just plastic bags."

"Wretched"

"Well then Dru, stay hungry. But we are going for a ride."

"Can I get a little kiss then, a hello kiss from my Daddy?"

Cordelia turned and walked away. Angel watched her leave noticeably angry.

"Tisk tisk Angel. Keeping secrets from your new love. Even the ones about her. Wicked little secrets."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 6/11

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was an awkward situation. 

Sitting in a convertible on Hollywood Boulevard with the erotic vampire that he had sired over 100 years ago. A creature he continually obsessed about, before and after he killed her. 

An incredibly neurotic, but gifted, vampire that wanted him dead not that many years ago. Wanted him dead because of his love for the Slayer. Then, after the love with the Slayer, just plain wanted him. Wanted her Angelus back in the family to stay.

What the hell was he doing there?

"You like them young, my love. Don't you? Was she a virgin? Like I was?"

"No. But I don't have to tell you that, do I?"

"She may as well have been. So what happened to Pretty Princess Buffy? Didn't like your yummy side anymore?"

"Maybe some things aren't meant to be, Dru. Like you and Spike."

"Spare me from that name. Rotten that I spent so many years with that wanker when I should have been rolling around with you, Angel my sweet. I could even tolerate the soul part."

"Could you now?"

"I could... except for that other thing."

"What thing?"

"Secrets Secrets Angel. You are very naughty. Little Bossy Cheerleader sees things. Just like I do only she doesn't hear the whispering secrets. Maybe she'll see them." 

"What do you know, Dru. Is it true?"

"Almost like a poem. Almost. Are you going to stake me after I tell you all my surprises?"

"Probably should, but as long as you behave yourself, I won't. You have my word."

"Well your word isn't what I want from you. There are other ways of staking me that I won't object." Drusilla danced her fingers across his lap. "Oh Angel, I miss the touch of my Sire. I won't tell Cheerleader Priss, I promise."

He smiled at her unusual request although not surprised. "I might have taken you up on that, quite a few months ago. But not now."

"How about just a little pet, old times sake I'll even purr, just the way you like it."

"Please. Just tell me." 

"I always give you what you want. You never give me anything." 

"I can remember giving you a lot, almost more than you could stand at times."

Drusilla's eyes closed as the memory of Angel ecstasies were recounted. He could claw his way to hell and back on her body all the while making their senses scream with desire. No one could do it like her Sire. The vampire had talent. 

With a few soft whimpers, she returned to their conversation. 

"You were always more than I could stand. Never hurt me enough, although you tried, so hard" Touching his lap again, "So where's my kiss?"

Angel leaned across the front seat, stopping inches from her face, "BEHAVE," and then he kissed her, fulfilling the initial request. 

"Now tell me." Angel kissed her again. With her eyes closed in pleasure, she finally conceded. 

"Just like when the poem starts, and your heart will beat again. Oh, and wouldn't I just love to be there. To drain you......... just like you drained me." With a fingernail she scratched at his neck. "But I won't be able to. With all my grief and all."

"Grief?"

"Well yes. Angel, my Darling. How can I possibly go on..... knowing I'm not going to be Daddy's little girl anymore." 

It was true. Everything was true.

"Rock a bye baby, Angel."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Relax Cordelia. Angel knows what he's doing. After all, he is Drusilla's sire. He has some power over her actions."

"Shut up Wesley, you don't even know her. She wicked and evil and ......... I don't want to talk about this. I wish these stupid people would just leave already. Surprise is over! Yea, Sue is 30. Go to her apartment. Celebrate there, take the food....... I don't care!"

Cordelia stormed out of the kitchen and headed straight into the bedroom, falling down face first on the mattress. Drusilla's presence bothered her horribly. Angelus was so obsessed with the women; he created her. Made her into what he wanted. Is that what Angel wants, too? Just like Drusilla said, makes you into his concubine. Would he do that to me? Cordelia Chase, vampire concubine. Doesn't have that nice ring to it.

Sitting up, she realizes that perhaps she is overreacting. It's painfully clear that Drusilla is definitely Angelus' type. Not Angel's type. In no century was she Angel's type. So as long as her claws stay away from every part of him, there will be nothing to worry about. 

"Can this night get any worse?", she collected herself and prepared for party reentry. Unexpected guests are no reason to be a poor hostess.

Cordelia walked out of the bedroom and back towards Wesley, who is in the kitchen taking advantage of the cheese platters. Yet another knock at the front door.

'Okay Cordelia, remember, this night can't get worse. Be charming.' As she opened the door, her rationality went out into the night. Right past Buffy's head.

"SHIT"

"Nice greeting Cordelia. Is Angel here?"

"Buffy. Hi..... so nice to see you........ just in town, visiting?"

"Okay repeat. Is Angel here?"

"No. He's not."

Buffy moved past Cordelia's arm and walked into the party. "What's with the festivities? Celebrating your near death experience, or so I heard you had one?" 

"Someone's birthday"

"Well I didn't bring a gift. But that doesn't matter, because I'm not staying. Where is Angel? He is living here........ with you?"

"Yes. For now, he is. But he isn't here."

"Where is he?"

"Not here...... Are you satisfied?"

"No Cordelia. Don't think 'satisfied' is near happening yet. Tell me.... since Angel wouldn't.... WHY is he living with you? Wesley living with you too. Who else are you living with, The LA Lakers?"

Cordelia slammed the front door closed. Buffy could barge into her home uninvited, but she was not going to tolerate judgments to be thrown around without cause. 

"What do you know about it? You live in Sunnydale. LA isn't your concern. I thought Angel made that clear to you."

"Well Angel left out a few important details. Since I couldn't get them out of him and since you didn't call me back yesterday, I thought it best..."

"Yesterday. Why would I call you back yesterday?"

"Didn't he give you the message? I talked to him yesterday. Asked him to have you call me. I was very surprised to have him answer the telephone, on a sunny afternoon and all. Suppose he spent the night here."

"Yea, Buffy, he spends a lot of nights here. He lives here, remember!"

"Okay. Got that part, but WHY again?"

"Angel lives here because his apartment burned to the ground, nearly killing Wesley. Wesley's apartment is gross and not exactly Angel friendly due to the fact the man doesn't own a single window covering. Not to mention that my apartment is now home base for the business. Keeps Angel from having to commute on all those bright sunny days. Does that answer your question!"

"Where does he sleep?"

"He sleeps most of the day. You were his first true love, Buffy, don't you know when he does most of his sleeping?"

"Well Cordelia, I didn't say WHEN, I said WHERE."

She walked up to her face, now furious at the questions. Questions that she was not prepared to answer diplomatically. 

"In my bed, Buffy. That's where he sleeps. In my bed." Continuing past her, Cordelia felt the urge to cry. This was not going to sit well with Angel. It was Angel's responsibility to tell Buffy, if ever. It was his choice.

"Well Cordelia, that's nice. That's very nice. Are you forgetting that he is off limit's, WAY outer off limit's?"

"Well he can't forget. You remind him just how 'outer off limit's' his existence is every time you come back into his life. Do you like torturing him like this? Do you like to know how you tear him up inside? For weeks. So much he only wants to sit in the dark. He doesn't talk, he doesn't eat. He just sits there, Buffy."

Buffy stared at Cordelia, surprised at her apparent anger. Also surprised that she no longer appeared to be the self-centered rich snob that never gave a moment's thought to other people's feelings. 

Something was responsible for this change. 

"You know Buffy, I'm glad Angel is not here. Gives you the chance to leave before you can refresh his feelings of loneliness. Something I find particularly upsetting because Angel isn't alone anymore. He has me and he has Wesley. We're his family now. He doesn't need to pine away for you anymore. Other people can love him, too. Not like you have the exclusive rights to Angel."

"Well we have unfinished business."

"Then it stays unfinished. You're wrong if you think Angel's going to be forever in mourning over his love loss with you. Just, for once, let him get over you. Stop hurting him."

Buffy started to defend herself but was immediately cutoff. Cordelia had stored away these little hostilities never imagining there would come a day when she could win an argument with Buffy. But it was concerning Angel. This argument she was determined to win.

"And stop throwing your new romances in his face! How could you do that? How could you be so cruel? I thought he meant something to you. I thought you loved him. Or did you just forget.... so wrapped up in Buffy, you just don't care."

"I do still love him, Cordelia. He knows it. That's what hurts him. Not my being here in LA."

"Well then you stop loving him!"

Buffy looked towards the ground, pausing to answer. "I can't. I try. But..."

"Let him think you can. Do that one thing for him, Buffy."

"it's why I'm here. Giles. He didn't think I should confront Angel yet. He didn't even want me to know, but Willow couldn't kept the secret. I'm here because, I have to hear the truth. Find out what it all means." Buffy turned to see another familiar face in a houseful of strangers. 

"Oh, hello Wesley. You are the other man I want to see. Giles explained it, now it's your turn."

"Giles spoke to you of the prophecy?"

"He did. I want to see the scroll. Does Angel know?"

"He does."

Cordelia, totally confused, interrupted the two. "Wesley. What are you talking about? What about the prophecy? You told me you didn't find anything more in the text."

"Answer me Wesley"

"Did you lie to me? .......... Answer me Wesley!"

"Cordelia. It's all on a need to know basis." Buffy turned away towards the dining room table, where she started to remove the food trays and the half eaten birthday cake, trying to make more room to work.

"Wesley, please. What does Angel know about?"

"Cordelia. Angel was very specific. He doesn't want me discussing this with you. He was extremely specific."

"Well do you always do what he tells you!"

"In this case, Angel is right. Did he take the cell phone? If he did, please call him. I believe we need him now."

"Damn it Wesley! You tell me now! If you won't tell me" she looked over at the scroll on the table, "then show me. Did Angel say you couldn't show me?"

Buffy, agitated with the loud music and annoying people coming and going in the kitchen, announced to the crowd that the party was now over. Time to go home. 

And as the last person left, Cordelia sat at the kitchen table beside Buffy and listened to Wesley's decipher the passages.

She sat and tried to comprehend that Angel had a greater purpose. Beyond the gift of humanity that the Greater Powers would someday grant as a reward. Cordelia's entire being fell numb as Angel's true future was spelled out before her. 

Angel would become human again. As would be his destiny, he would father the Blessed One, the last Slayer. It was his final destiny. And it was to be with Buffy. The Chosen One. It was foretold. It was right in front of her, scribbled on mildew stained paper. Might as well have been etched in stone. 

__

'He knew this. Angel knew this all along. How could he do this to me?' Cordelia's mind was racing with questions as the tears filled her eyes. _'Why would he do this to me? Why wouldn't he tell me?' _

As quickly as she had forced the answers out of Wesley, Cordelia ran from the table and into the solitude of the bedroom. The bedroom that she had shared with someone who had lied to her about everything that was most important in life. 

Nothing was making sense. Cordelia was drowning in her thoughts that replayed in her head. _'He said he loved me. I let him love me.' _Her cries where muffled by the pillow she pressed to her face. They swelled up inside of her and the feeling of choking was making her sick. The cries couldn't come fast enough and she gulped air between them.

An overwhelming feeling of betrayal not to mention the utter confusion of it all crowded her mind. It didn't make sense. After their evening on the motorcycle, she had never felt closer to anyone. 

It was the night that Wesley returned and it was the night that he must have told Angel about his future. If he knew, why did he come to her while she was in the bath? Why would he have touched her like that? Led her through the hours of ecstasy that now felt like nothing more than a crude violation. How could he? 

The aching in her stomach made her nauseous. And Angel's scent on the pillows didn't help. Trying hard to calm her nerves, one particular memory came to mind.

The Oracles had told Angel about her blood in his veins. That with her blood, his soul was anchored. He could experience human sexual pleasure. Because of her, it was possible.

Cordelia's cries returned and strengthened. 

She made his soul permanent. Angel had conveniently told her the news while she was in the bath. It was the reason that she gave herself to him without any reservation. It was why they had made love all night long. 

The realization was alarming. 

Angel had simply taken advantage. 

"Dennis.... Dennis... Dennis." She cried out for her silent and utterly reliable friend, wishing for that moment that Dennis would manifest beside her, in a physical body that would be able to hold her still and keep her from shaking. 

Dennis was with her and he did his best. 

He moved the hair covering her face. It was the most he could do. Let her know that he would never leave her. She could talk for hours if she wanted. Dennis had no where else to be. Not for an eternity. If he could only tell her the truth.

Tell her that she was The Chosen One.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 7/11

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy was waiting for Angel to return. She didn't know that he was with Drusilla, driving around Los Angeles. It would be a night for surprises.

With all of the scroll's evidence, Buffy was not satisfied. It didn't feel right. Slayer's chosen ability was not a family trait. It was not something that you inherited from your Grandmother.

But it was in black and white and in whatever language it was meant to be transcribed in. Angel would be human someday. 

Every day, Buffy dreamt of finding a cure for him as if being dead was a disease. It was the biggest of the big obstacles that kept them apart. He left her because it would never change. Buffy knew that he would always love her. But it wasn't good enough.

Though, with all of her imagination, Buffy never pictured Angel fathering a child. Not even raising a pet or growing a plant. Things he touch, died. _'Look at Cordelia's plants. They were just about dead. Given another week with Angel in the house and they would be compost.'_

"Wesley, what do you think is up with Cordelia? Overreacted much? Sorry that she will be out of a job, maybe."

"Well Buffy, Cordelia was the one that urged me to seek Rupert's help in deciphering the scroll. I'm sure her feelings are hurt that I had lied to her. She was truly concerned with Angel's well being. Angel was seriously hurt the night before I visited Rupert. Cordelia was sick with worry."

"He got better. He always gets better."

"Well, she worried. Please, don't be so hard on her. Cordelia has changed since Sunnydale. She's finding out that life is not that easy and nothing is handed to you. You have to learn to appreciate what matter most."

"Well this is a pretty nice apartment. Angel pays that well?"

"No. It's haunted and is rent controlled. Phantom Dennis. Long story. Too long to explain now. Although, I don't care much for that Dennis spirit. It's as if he always wants me to leave."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

__

'Okay Cordelia, you say you are an actress, you can do this. You have to do this.'

Back out of the bedroom, Cordelia walked confidently out to the living room and started picking up the plastic cups and pretzels laying about the apartment. Keeping busy is probably the best thing. At least until Angel returns. 

Then, there will be no best thing. 

As she moved about with a purpose, Cordelia tried hard to think of something to say to Angel. What could she say, with Buffy in the apartment? 

__

'Probably in the kitchen picking out wedding china. Would she even wait for Angel. Angel deserves more.' Cordelia was certain.

Suddenly, a blinding flash of colors ripped through her eyes, pulling her to the ground, breaking the vase that stood on the end table. This vision gave none of the usual dizzy warning signs. 

Instead she felt crippled and vulnerable as the sight of the vampire killing a teenager became her only focus. 

Cordelia tried to pull herself up as Wesley came to her rescue.

"Cordelia. Did you have a vision? Are you okay?"

She wouldn't answer him. Like dozens of times before, she knew what to expect. 

Explain in basic detail the soon-to-happen crime scene. Find Angel. Oh yes, no more waiting. They would definitely have to find Angel now. He was the last person she wanted to see. 

Cordelia would take the vampire in her vision over the one she lived with, given the choice. It was the choice she had the right to make.

"No. Wesley. I have a migraine headache. All the music, people, him leaving with Drusilla, whatever."

"Drusilla! Did you just say Drusilla! Why in the hell would he be with Drusilla!"

"Showed up a little unexpected, Buffy. You know the type."

Buffy and Wesley returned to the kitchen to find the aspirins but became involved in a full Dru discussion. While their attentions were turned, Cordelia realized what would be the best way to repay Angel for his cruel deceptions. 

She took a small shopping bag, a stake and Wesley's fighting axe from inside the fireplace and walked out the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Where is she Wesley!"

"She left. I don't know where. Said she had a migraine and then, she was gone."

"A migraine. From a vision?"

"At first it seemed so, doubled over on the floor and all. Broke that vase, too."

Angel moved past Wesley and focused on Buffy. She was leaning against Dennis' wall keeping an eye on Drusilla still standing in the doorway. The vampire was taunting the Slayer with hissing giggles.

"Hi."

"Hi Angel. Care to tell me about this..... Dru thing?"

"Not really."

"Mind if I kill her? She's giving me the wiggins."

"She's okay, just ignore her. So, Buffy.... why are you here?"

Buffy left the wall and walked towards him. "Don't you think we need to talk? I think we need to talk. In fact, I think Wesley should leave, find your missing employee for you, since you seemed to be so oddly over concerned, and give us a little privacy."

"There's been a mistake, Buffy. This should never have happened." Angel turned back around to Wesley who was looking for his axe that was last on the mantel. "Wesley, please don't tell me that you talked to Cordelia about the Chosen One Prophecy. When I specifically...."

"She, more or less, overheard. Then she read the translations." 

'WHAT DID YOU TELL HER!" Angel growled fiercely that startled both Buffy and Wesley, but excited Drusilla.

"They told her, Angel my love. But it was all a lie. Everyone is lying. Pretty girl is all tormented inside. Her head filled with pain. So very torn apart. And she will make you so awfully sorry, Angel. Acting like the Slayer and all. Will make that vampire all giddy." 

The thought of his Seer, vulnerable and hurting, out in the night alone, trying to revenge his demons as her own form of revenge was too much to bear. Angel's rage emerged bringing forth his own internal demons, enlightening his senses to better find Cordelia. 

Immediately, he could feel her pain. He could smell her fear. 

"She's not far. She's walking." Angel fled through the door after the direction the senses were leading. 

Keep her from ill fate. The Oracles urged him to protect and shelter her from anyone, anything that could change his life in an instant. Change the path of their future.

The Slayer, The Ex-Watcher and the seductive Vampire followed.

It was quite the entourage. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 8/11

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Something deep in Cordelia's subconscious guided her through the alleyways. Not able to focus on anything else but Angel and the anguish in her heart, she left the memories of her vision be her guide. 

The school yard looked the same as in her vision. No sign of a teenager or a vampire, for that matter. Maybe she was too early..... or too late. 

But, she was alone. Alone in the alley and alone in life. Not even one creepy vampire to take her agony out on.

Maybe she'd wait a few minutes. Nowhere else to be that would prove as satisfying as sitting on the broken concrete sidewalk with a wooden stick in your hand. 

"He'll worry himself crazy." She told the sidewalk as she tapped the stake against her legs.

"Maybe he won't."

The tears came back and there was no reason to stop them. The very thought of Angel turning human only to get Buffy pregnant was absolutely unbearable. Crying was the only way she could deal with the hurt. Maybe if she let it all go now, she could face Angel with a little more dignity. 

She was determined to deal with it as an adult, not a lovesick girl who thought she had just fallen in love with the love of her life. 

"A sexually inexperienced moron, probably quite the disappointment."

"Look how many years Angelus lived with Darla........."

"And just look at Drusilla. How many times do you think he's done her....."

"A thousand probably."

But her own very recent memories of their lovemaking still felt so wonderful. Never before had she had so much pleasure just delivered to her so unselfishly.

"God.... how could he do this to me?" She put her head on her knees realizing that he'll sense everything she's feeling inside and that there isn't much she can keep private. That inner security was now gone. 

That complete violation was enough to change her pain to anger.

Letting Angel know just how much it was killing her would be a sign of weakness. 

"Cordelia Chase is not weak." 

She's also not as strong as Buffy.

With all of her sobs, with her makeup smeared down her face, Cordelia was relieved to be having a conversation with just the sidewalk. Sidewalks actually answer less than Dennis and they never form opinions. 

With the sidewalk, she was so very alone.

Alone, except for the three vampires on the rooftop, watching her every move. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That familiar, uneasy feeling of being watched didn't go entirely unnoticed. Cordelia felt Angel's mentally tugging; confirming that he knows she had stormed out. 

Angel was angry with her; she could feel it as clear as that annoying tugging, trying to get her to come home. By now, he would have talked with Buffy. 

"Buffy probably told him how rude I was. Maybe that's the mental action going on..... the vampire's equivalent to 'ringing ears'."

The more she thought about it, she had every right to defend her actions. And considering the contrary circumstances, telling Buffy about being able to have Angel all night long and not force him to turn soulless was becoming too inviting to pass up.

"Just like that saying.... with hell's fury and a women scorned....or something like that. Little bit of payback is what I need. Go out with a bang. Oh... I'm definitely going to have to get a job, now. A real job. Shit! Shit! Shit!"

With the little bag of weapons, Cordelia retraced her steps back towards home. Around the corner of the alley she walked and right into the ambush waiting to trap her.

The scream of terror stopped everything working in her mind. All that was left was the hideous faces smiling and laughing and joking. 

"Talking to yourself will make you crazy."

"Unless, you are crazy. Are you crazy?", the other vampire hissed.

"We can help fix you. Help you deal."

As she backed away, she slowly reached into the bag to grab the stake. They saw her actions and immediately halted the attempt.

"Why don't you just give us the bag"

"We know what you have in there, Princess."

"Princess. Why did you call me Princess? Don't you call me that! Only Doyle called me that.....you piece of shit!" She swung the bag in front of her, hitting them with the heavy axe resting at the bottom. 

Breaking away, Cordelia ran as fast as she could all the while trying to retrieve the stake and form some kind of a plan. The vampires followed, laughing at her screams. They were making it a game. A little hide and go seek.

Around the darkened school playground she ran, trying to find somewhere to hide. Somewhere safe until the morning, only six incredibly long hours away. Maybe there was a payphone outside. If she could make it to the road, she could stop a car, ask for help.

As she rounded the front of the building, she saw the teenager with the face from her vision. He was leaning against the window, watching her run.

"Run!" she screamed as she neared the building. "Get out of here....what are you stupid!"

"Is there a problem, miss?"

"Yes, don't be an idiot! Can't you see I'm running from someone! There's three of them, come on let's go....... move it already!" 

Cordelia grabbed his arm and pulled him away from the building. 

He grabbed back as his face changed into what she feared most. She was too late.

"No, miss. I believe there's four of them. And tag..... you're it!."

Using the one move she could handle, Cordelia slammed her knee into his crouch, sending the vampire writhing to the ground. With one perfect hit, she sunk the stake into his heart and in a puff, he was gone.

"No time to celebrate your nonslayer slayer ability, now!" 

The other three were gaining on her. So back around the building and through the parking lot, she ran. Through the big wall of bushes and right into Angel's arms.... he was waiting to grab her.

Initially screaming, Cordelia looked at his vampire face and then dropped the stake from her hand. Relieved, Angel's face changed back to normal and he just stared into her eyes. 

"So do I have some dusting to do, Cordelia? How many are there?"

She didn't answer Buffy. With all the words racing in amongst her mind, Cordelia had nothing to say. 

Remaining motionless as Angel covered her body with a huge embrace, she then reacted as she struggled to push free. The hurt in her eyes said it all. He was not to touch her. He was only allowed to save her life, just this one last time. 

"Cordelia..... why would you do this?"

"Don't........ Don't you do that! Don't you blame me!...." 

"Please Cor.... you have to listen..... this never should have happened..."

"Shut up Angel, just shut up!!" She yelled without the adult self-control that she had planned on showing. It was too late for any restraints, and she started to cry uncontrollably, without any concern as to Buffy or Wesley or Drusilla. Everything was wiped out.

Like with all the wonderful happy emotions, all of her terrible grief also echoed in Angel's mind. She was sick with grief and he, too, became overwhelmed. He followed her down to the edge of bushes and did his best to console her pain.

"Please Cor... I never wanted it to turn out this way.... I should have told you before....even if I wasn't sure. I should have told you."

"Angel, please spare me. I know. Okay, I know!"

"No... you don't know. No one does."

"Wrong. Seems like everyone knew but me! I had to hear it from Buffy!! I had to hear it sitting right beside her! Why is that Angel? Huh... why?"

He took her hands and kept her from pulling away. 

Buffy came bounding back from the schoolyard. "Well that was easy enough. They were asking to get wasted. Did you see what they were wearing? The Lost Boys look is so way over!"

She looked over at Angel and Cordelia. "and what is going on?"

"Wesley, could you please take Buffy and Drusilla back. Take them to your place.... any place. I have to talk to Cordelia alone." 

"But Angel, now isn't..."

"Wesley... please! Take them both back and make sure they don't kill each other. And Dru...... keep your hands off of Wesley!"

"Oh but Angel, my dear, I could like this one....English is my favorite kind."

"Angel is this some kind of joke? You have to be joking.....Are you trying to get back at me for Riley.......with Cordelia? This is Cordelia in case you're forgetting..... Oh, you've got to be joking!"

"Yea, that's right Buffy, I am a big joke. Or didn't you know"

Judging her fragile state, "Please Wesley, now!...."

Wesley didn't wait for explanations. He ushered the girls away, but Buffy turned and held her ground.

"No Angel. I'm not going anywhere! Not until you explain this."

"Buffy, I know we have to talk. But not now. Not like this. Just go with Wesley. Please Buffy, just......... go with Wesley."

Buffy watched as Angel turned all of his attentions back to Cordelia. As if she no longer knew the man that stood before her, everything just felt different. From the way he was looking at Cordelia, Buffy realized Angel had moved on. There was such love in his eyes. Love that was hers for so many years. And that look of love had always belonged exclusively to her.

More devastating than she could ever conceive, Angel's eyes were now no longer looking her way. That love in his eyes was for Cordelia. And as impossible as it seemed, Buffy realized that Angel was in love with someone else. Unable to face this cruel joke, she disappeared in the other direction, leaving Wesley with Drusilla.... alone with Drusilla.

"Drusilla is it? Angel said you have to keep your hands off of me. I have a stake and I will not hesitate to use it."

"Oh my new little pet. I don't need my hands. And Angel knows it." Drusilla purred at Wesley and it made him blush. 

"Well then...... right......Coffee?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 9/11

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Cordelia... will you hear me out? Please, just do that for me.....don't say anything. Hard enough time saying this without you interrupting...."

Cordelia's tear filled gaze fixed itself at the ground. If she looked in his face, he would know exactly what was in her heart. He no longer was allowed access.

"Do you remember, when you came to the Oracles chamber with me."

She nodded.

"Remember when I said that they wanted you."

She wiped the tears from her eyes. "They didn't like my watch."

"They didn't even look at the watch, Cordelia, they were looking at you. They thought I brought you to their chamber, to talk....I'm not sure why. They told me about your blood and how it anchored my soul. They told me a lot of things. Not much I understood. Not until Wesley came home. When I become human, it won't be just as a reward. There's another reason."

"Angel, I already got this part, so spare me the rehash........." Cordelia pushed away from his grasp, moving to the line of trees and away from Angel's words. 

"Please Cor. Don't..... The scroll says The Knowing will find The Chosen One. Together with the vampire with a soul... me.. I.."

Angel tried to regroup his thoughts. For everything that he had planned to say, nothing was coming easy.

"They will bear the greatest of all gifts. The Blessed One. The Last Slayer." 

He waited to see some response, some flicker of understanding in her eyes. But, she never looked at him. Never allowing herself to see the tears building in Angel's eyes.

"Cordelia, please......will you look at me!" She moved back around but couldn't look at him.

"The Oracles are the Knowing Ones. They found The Chosen One. They told me and I didn't understand. They said she had a greater gift to give. Greatest of all gifts. And I had to keep her from harm, no matter what."

Angel moved her gaze from the ground up to his and held it there, against her will.

"The blood of The Chosen One would anchor my soul..... Cordelia... it's you." 

With those tears running from his eyes, "it's always been you."

Cordelia felt and overwhelming dizziness spin past her eyes, collapsing her to the ground. 

"No.... No....." She struggled to stand again. To move away from him and away from the cruel joke being thrown her way. "No.. Angel... that can't be. NO"

"Why? Why can't it. The Oracles were certain. The scroll is certain."

"They're wrong. The PTBs made a mistake. First they make me your Seer, then this!.........No....wrong." Her tears returned and so did that deep, what-to-say-now panic. "I have to get out of here."

"Cordelia, NO. Would you just look at me. Did you hear what I said? Did you really hear me?"

"Angel........ it can't be me. It has to be Buffy. She's the Slayer. She's the love of your life, Angel, not me. It will never be me!"

"It is you. I love you, Cordelia. I loved you before I even knew about the prophecy." His hand fit against her face. "You are my chosen one...... I choose to be with you." 

Angel wiped the tears from her face. "Everything they're giving me..... I want to share it all with you."

__

'Everything they're giving him..... Everything they're giving him..... oh god.....' Cordelia thought as she fell back down to the grass. 

The understanding of the Greater Gift just hit her. The Last Slayer. A daughter. She was going to have Angel's daughter. 

"A Daughter?"

Angel smiled the biggest smile she had ever seen come from his face. It shined from his teeth all the way to his beautiful brown eyes. He pulled her up and held around her waist.

"Yea...", pulling her in closer, "how about that..." 

She didn't stay in his grip. Instead, Cordelia moved away and paced along the tree line.

"The Last Slayer. I'm going to have..... NO Angel, that can't be right. I mean.... why would they pick me? Honestly.. do I look like the 'Sara Conner' type to you!"

"What? Who's Sara Conner?"

"Oh you know, Sara Conner, Terminator, Arnold, I'll be back.... you know."

"What?"

"Terminator comes back from the future to kill Sara Conner and then this guy......... Well she's going to give birth to a son, some future leader of the world......"

"Is that a movie?"

"I am NOT Sara Conner! She kicked some serious ass in T2! I can't even save myself from a stupid badly dressed vampire!"

"You're talking about a movie. Right?"

"It's all the same...... I can't do this Angel. No way can I do this. And be pregnant!.... no thank you... not for me.... did the demon pregnancy once already.... not again."

There was hurt building in his eyes. "She won't be a demon, Cor."

"You're not gonna knock me up then..... croak on me are you?"

He smiled in hopes that she was making a joke. "Don't think that's the plan.... But this won't happen, not for a long time, you realize this."

"Not long? How about NOT EVER!" 

Cordelia stopped as she now noticed the immense hurt in his face. With a few yelled comments, she had managed to reject Angel in every possible way. His past, present and future all the while knowing that underneath it all, he was truly ecstatic with this gift. Wanting everything that was planned for him. 

He wanted her to want it too.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. It's just......they have to be wrong."

"But I don't want them to be wrong, Cordelia."

"Since this hasn't happened yet, then it can still be changed. If they wanted to see me Angel, then take me back to the Oracles. It's time."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel remained silent as he led Cordelia to the Chamber of Lost Souls. Watching her expressions, it was clear that she regretted all their private moments together. He wasn't sure what hurt more, her wishing that she didn't love him, or her desire to take away their future life together. 

"Are you going in with me?"

Angel only shook his head. 

"I'm so sorry, Angel. You've had time to adjust to everything. This is more than I can handle. I'm sorry."

"If you're going to ask them to change it all.... I don't want to be a part of it. But I won't stop you, either."

There wasn't anything more she could say. Determined that this was the most responsible thing she could do. Angel needs the love of his life for the rest of his life. Why would it be her? What more could she offer to his life besides always feeling like the second choice.

If Angel had the choice, he would have chosen Buffy. Asking the Oracles to make a mends and have his future be with Buffy would be the last thing she could give to him.

She loved him that much.

Cordelia turned to face the Chamber of Lost Souls, glowing in her presence. As she stepped forward, Angel desperately grabbed her hand.

"Are you going to ask them to change this?"

Pulling her hand from his touch, she whispered, "I'm sorry."

And then she was gone. 

Angel sunk to the floor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

COME BEFORE US, MY DEAR.

Cordelia stood in the stone palace entrance as if on display. The blue and silver silhouettes moved closer, curious with their long awaited guest.

"So... you are the Oracles...... you wanted to see me?"

WE HAVE ALWAYS SEEN YOU. YOUR ACTIONS ARE WATCHED 

BUT WE ARE GLAD YOU HAVE COME

"I don't really have a gift for you"

THAT GIFT LIES WITHIN YOU

"No. That's why I'm here. This prophecy thing is wrong. I'm not the childbearing Chosen One.....I can't be."

WHAT HAS BEEN FOUND WILL ALWAYS BE

IT ALL LIES WITHIN YOU

AND WITH HIM

"You should have picked the Slayer. She's the true love of his life. Buffy can face anything. I can't. I can't have this responsibility. I can't."

YOU ALREADY HAVE EVERYTHING YOU NEED

"What? Everything I need? What does that mean?"

ALL THE STRENGTHS YOU NEED YOU WILL HAVE WITH HIM

AND HIS TIME WILL COME

AND HE WILL BE A DEMON NO MORE

"The future doesn't have to be set......... you can still change this. Angel wants to be with Buffy. I have nothing to give him."

ALL YOU WILL NEED IS LOVE

"What? Ahh.. That's a Beatles song....."

The Oracles looked at each other in confusion and then quietly whispered their conclusions.

WE DO NOT UNDERSTAND

HOW CAN YOU NOT WANT

WHAT YOU HAVE YET TO SEE?

"See? See what?"

The echo of a child's laughter came from behind. She turned around to find the doorway was gone. It was as if she was looking into her own dream.... to a place where she had never been, but that felt like home. 

Then Cordelia glimpsed the most beautiful, perfect face imaginable. 

With Angel's smile, their baby girl was laughing. She was falling into a mound of leaves, tossing them, and laughing, and laughing.

The vision lasted only seconds and then it was gone.

"NO NO! NO !" Cordelia's emotions burst uncontrollably. She felt to the stones that had only just replaced the sight of her child. "You have to bring her back.....please.......please..... let me see her!"

The young female Oracle felt her emotions and maybe also felt sympathy. She silently moved across the chamber and took Cordelia's hands. 

"Please....." cried Cordelia, "Oh please.... bring her back.... one more minute.....please......."

SHE HER THROUGH YOUR OWN EYES

And with a wave of the Oracle's hand, Cordelia saw bright sunlight that was filled with Angel's laughter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 10/11

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The sounds became clear as she focused through the brilliant light of day.

Angel was in that sunshine. Alive.

He was in a swimming pool. And in his arms was their baby girl. 

He was holding her over the top of the water. Getting her own little toes wet by splashing, Angel coaxed her into the water. And then he coaxed her to laugh. 

Cordelia could hear them talking and splashing. She tried to speak, but nothing came out. Careful with this living dream, she stood amazed while watching her future life with the two people who would mean everything.

Cordelia absorbed every moment. Her face. His face. 

Seeing Angel as a father, truly alive, was astonishing. He didn't look the same. He looked ... different... somehow. 

Glimpsing her future took away all of the fears in an instant. It told her that she and Angel would be together. Angel would stay by her side, stand by both of his girls. He would help raise their daughter and he wouldn't leave. 

Angel was alive. Angel was a dad. 

And Angel was her husband.

Existing in her own future, Cordelia also found all of the comforting memories. The thoughts of him in the delivery room, crying and kissing her as they held their new baby. How he would wake up and do the 12 a.m. and the 3 a.m. feedings so she could try to sleep. Listening to him read children's books, as new to him as was to their baby girl, for hours until they all fell asleep. 

Angel had amazing patience as a dad. He put the matching crib and furniture together, figured out the complicated baby girl clothes, tied the little shoes as she struggled to kick them off. He would also sneak his little one into the shower with him as often as possible. After all, she loved the hot rain of water as much as her dad.

Then there was the diapers.... changing diapers evolved into a game and he was usually the winner. Usually. He did the Santa Claus thing.... the trick-or-treating ... the potty training.

Those memories were the beginning of his life. Angel had learned how to be human from the littlest of teachers. 

His little teacher would grow up not knowing the centuries of torment that her dad had lived through. And the torment that he caused others. In her eyes, he was simply 'Dad' and he was perfect.

And in this time, she could picture him packing the lunches, taking her to school and returning her continually waves until the big front doors closed. Insisting she be 21 before she could date, and never liking any boy who even looked her way. 

Trying to protect her from the cruelties of life, all the while dreading the moment that her own final destiny would arrive. Letting go would be the hardest for Angel. So, he was holding on tight now, while she let him.

Cordelia was only allowed to witness everything that time was keeping her from having in her life today. Desperately wanting to call out to Angel, wanting to call to them both. But all of those words were stuck in silence. 

He kissed the baby and then held her out at arms length, letting her kick her way back to his chest. With his breaths of air on her face, she held her own breath under the water and then laughed on the way out, reaching back for his embrace. Again and again she kicked her way back to her dad.

"Hon... you have to get the camera..... look she's swimming... she loves it."

Clearly, Angel utterly adored his little one. Each time taking her back, he fixed her suit and moved up her plastic floaties on her little arms. He walked around the pool with her clung to his body, happy to be held.

Lowered back to the water, her little hands grasped two of his fingers and he pulled her as she kicked. "Come on sweetie......swim to Da..... swim to Da......." 

Then back to his neck she rested, only to leave go again and jumped back to make a splash. She was fearless with him by her side. Reaching again for his embrace, she cheered at her accomplishment. 

And, oh, did she ever have her dad's smile. He could never deny that she was his true gift of life. She really was the greatest gift of all.

They are going to have a very happy, beautiful baby.

Each time Angel broke his smile to kiss her cheek, she would laugh and touch his face, telling him to do it again. Cordelia couldn't love him more than at this very moment.

Then with a last final paddle, his little girl stayed put against his chest, fitting along his neck. He tilted his head to hold her their, lifting her feet out of the water, cradling her wet body to his own. 

Tired and hungry, she was now done with swimming. 

"Okay.... wanna go to Mum.... "

She turned from him and looked into her mother's eyes. With the biggest brown eyes looking up, Cordelia saw herself. 

Her tiny arms moving away from him, the baby reached out for her mother with grasping hands. 

The emotions flooded in her mind, but no sound would come. She wanted to touch her little face and call out to her. Tell her how much she's already loved years before she's even conceived. Tell her that she never wants to leave this living dream. It was another moment of true happiness made possible by the love of her life. The future would be full of those moments. 

The littlest angel smiled up in anticipation. Cordelia reached out for her.

She had to touch her baby, even if for only a moment. Just hold her. Just once. 

Then came the whiteness of light consuming her eyes. The sight of her beautiful baby girl reaching to her..... just faded away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the ominous flash of light, Cordelia emerged back into the outside chamber of the Oracles. Collapsing on the stones, she screamed to go back. 

In shock, Angel pulled her to him. At first, she resisted, returning to the doorway.

"NO I want to go back! Oh please...God....let me go back.... Angel. Tell them. Let me touch her!........I have to touch her!!"

Cordelia turned and fell into Angel's arms, sobbing and struggling for breath.

"Angel.... I saw her. They let me see her. I was there.. she's so beautiful, oh Angel ..... please send me back....."

From his few moments of anguish when Cordelia left, Angel's world had been completely turned upside. She left him, determined to change their future. Now, she was begging to be in it.

"Please......I need her now..... now." 

For over an hour, Angel held Cordelia as her cries calmed and she turned quiet. After so many hours of crying, Cordelia didn't have the strength to talk anymore. She couldn't see anything else, or hear anything else. 

Only the baby's voice was the sound she could hear, tucked away safe in her mind, and along with that incredible smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TITLE: "SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW" Part 11/11 The Conclusion

The Continuation from "THE OTHER CHOSEN ONE"

AUTHOR:HizAngel (Lisa S)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel sat at the foot of the bed, numb. For all of his responsibilities, the most important was to keep Cordelia safe. But nothing he could do would make her happy. Too weak to cry any longer, she laid in the bed, silent and staring into the dark.

She wouldn't eat. She didn't want to fall asleep. If she spoke of the baby, she would start to cry, and she had no tears left for that. Her body was aching with pain and he didn't know how to stop it.

"Angel?"

"Try to get some sleep, you're exhausted." He moved up to the bed and laid behind her.

"She looks like you." Cordelia rolled over and smiled, resting her head beside his. "She has your smile....it's identical. And you looked so happy."

"I was there?"

"You were holding her. Swimming. I don't know where. But you were so happy and really alive, Angel. You loved her so much."

"Of course I will love her....what did you expect?"

"I didn't think about it.... about you with a baby. But you were perfect with her. The perfect dad. She just loved you.....so much....."

He rubbed her back trying to calm her nerves and keep her from shaking. "Can you tell me... without crying. You can't cry anymore, Cor, you're making yourself sick." He moved the hair from her eyes. "Can you try?"

In his comforting embrace, Cordelia replayed the entire vision by detailed description. As she spoke, Angel's doubt that she wanted the baby was gone. Cordelia wasn't fearing the future anymore. Now, she couldn't wait for it to come. 

The Oracles weren't taking anything away from him because Cordelia asked them too. The Oracles simply let her see what she would be losing if the future were to be changed. 

But it wasn't going to be changed. As Cordelia recounted his own interactions with his daughter, he could hear the change in her voice. She was gushing over what perfection could come from their genes. It was a basic maternal protectiveness. An adoration for her own flesh and blood. 

She would never need to worry about inner strength again; it was there building, from this moment on.

"I remember other things too. Strange memories that haven't even happened yet. Mainly of you. Now it seems as if it were all just a dream."

"Well don't tell me all the memories. I'd like to be surprised."

"I will tell you that I see a lot of deja vu in my future and I hate deja vu."

Angel now had every reason to stay alive in order to be alive. He may have the coming apocalypse, plagues, and many evil demons waiting to battle to the death in his future, but now he could face it all with a new certainty. Angel had everything to live for. Life was pretty good. 

Now, if he could just get her to sleep..........

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cordelia was stirring in the bed. She was obviously dreaming until the dream woke her in the early hours of the day. The sun was nearly up.

"Angel? What are you doing over there?"

He was in the corner, busy drawing and was apparently not finished when she woke.

"You are not suppose to be awake yet. We had a deal."

"I know. Are you drawing me again? Don't you think you have enough of me sleeping, Angel. I couldn't look any worse if I tried."

"You look beautiful."

"I look like I have something nesting in my hair and my eyes are all icky."

"You still look beautiful."

"Well, at least you can improvise. I'm just happy you're not into photography. Think Wes would have to be your new roomie then."

He moved away the tablet and walked from the chair to the bed.

"Did you have another nightmare?"

"No. Have you stopped getting in my brain. I thought you'd know."

"Know what?"

"I keep seeing her Angel. She is all I can think about." Cordelia's hands covered her eyes, hiding the waiting tears.  


"No Cor, please don't cry, you're stomach can't handle it. You'll get sick again."

"Angel, I don't even know her name. I don't even know my own daughter's name."

He leaned down and kissed her lips. "There's a good reason for that."

"Why?"

"Come here." He pulled her upright and she fell to his chest. "You don't know her name because we haven't named her yet. I think we have years to go before that. We don't even know how long. Did I look any older?"

"Well, you looked different. I don't know how. Kinda tan. Your hair was lighter. But I don't think you looked any older and I didn't see myself."

"Well then, we won't know how many years we have. Some things are worth waiting for, trust me."

"I want to hold her now, Angel. She's so beautiful. You were swimming and she was kicking in the water......and why does she have to be the a Slayer? Why can't we just have a normal daughter?"

"Look at her parents, Cor.?"

"Soooo.....I want her now. I can't wait for her, I need her now, Angel."

"You're not ready now. And in case you've forgotten, neither am I."

She pounded on his chest towards his heart. "Well come on Angel, all we need to do, is get this heart started again, then.... you get to knock me up ... then it's happy baby time. I'm begging you."

"Well in the meantime, we get to practice. How about that?" 

She leaned up to kiss him and then folded back down onto his lap. "You are going to marry me, aren't you?"

He smiled, "And I just thought of something..... what if... The PTBs wait until you are, let's say... older than I am ... then I turn human and you end up... the older women. Married to a younger guy......."

Cordelia just looked at him with disbelief. After all her overwhelming sadness, that was the best attempt he had at cheering her up. 

"Please. I'm still sad here... remember."

"Sorry. I thought it was funny." He moved her back to the pillow. "Go back to sleep. You promised me you'd sleep til noon."

"I just think about her face, Angel. What if I start to forget. What if she fades. What if we name her the wrong name?"

"Well what if you stop with the What Ifs and go back to sleep. If you don't... you're going to look older than I do........... without the decade long wait."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cordelia's eyes opened to greet the daylight. At least it was daylight on the other side of the window shade.

With all of her senses, filling with thoughts, her eyes focused on several folded pieces of paper leaning against his sketch pad...........

__

Cordelia,

There are some things in life that are meant to be. So much, that they were written down, to last forever. I don't know how to make you understand everything that I feel or that I could tell you what you mean to me. But I do know that without you, I wouldn't have much. 

Forgive me if I use some else's words, but I found another way to say it better. You'll recognize it because you play it all the time.

~~~~~~~~

How can I convince you that what you see is real

Who am I to blame you for doubting what you feel

I was always reaching, you were just a girl I knew

I took for granted, the friend I have in you.

You followed me through changes and patiently you'd wait

Till I came to my senses, too

it's a miracle of fate.

Now I look into your eyes, I can see forever, the search is over

You were will me all the while.

And then I touched your hand, I could hear you whisper

The search is over

Love was right before my eyes

~~~~~~~~

For all the gifts you have given me, now and tomorrow, this is the only one I can give you today. Stay with me until I can give you more. 

But, until that day comes, I will never allow our baby's face to fade in your eyes. 

I love you, today & always, 

Angel

And as Cordelia opened the sketch pad, the two people she loved the most were on it's pages. Taken from her dreams, Angel put his love's sacred memories to paper. 

Their daughter will exist within these pages until the day she is born.

All of her emotions flooded back again. But now, she was able to call out to her little one. Call to her as if she was reaching up again. 

And then it came to Cordelia. She knew. By looking at this memory on paper, she knew.

Like one of those hidden memories, it was only waiting to be said out loud.

She touched the lines of her baby's face and whispered.......

__

Amanda.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The End ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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